What do you think about friendships at work, particularly between the leader and the team? Is it a recipe for disaster or does it bring about higher levels of engagement and performance?
Developing friendships at work can come about in so many ways. You may have been promoted to the leadership role from within the team so your relationship with your colleagues changes from being peers to now being the leader. You may have been referred by a friend who already works at the organisation. However, you came to lead, personal friendships can cause some confusion about boundaries and expectations.
So, can we be friends at work?
Yes, no, maybe?
The research tells us that employees with close connections at work are more productive, creative, and collaborative. This makes sense. Maslow told us that belonging is one of the most important factors for our sense of connection, and a necessary human need.
Leaders and team members can be friends, but it’s important to navigate this dynamic carefully to maintain a healthy work environment. I have identified some areas for you to think about if you feel your professional and personal relationships could get in the way of great work and a strong team culture.
Transparency and Communication
If you want to be friends with team members, be transparent about your intentions and establish open lines of communication. This helps avoid any perception of favouritism or conflicts of interest.
Professional Boundaries
It’s crucial to maintain professionalism and boundaries in the workplace. Being friends with team members should not compromise your ability to make tough decisions or provide constructive feedback. This means not avoiding that feedback discussion and actively managing performance. Watch this doesn’t go the other way to where you don’t recognise or acknowledge great performance, because you feel you don’t need to. “They know how I feel about their performance”- well not unless you tell them.
Consistency
Leaders should treat all team members fairly and consistently. If you are friends with some but not others, it can lead to resentment and create a divisive atmosphere.
Conflict Resolution
Leaders should be prepared to handle conflicts that may arise between team members, including conflicts involving friends. Address these issues objectively and fairly.
Performance Evaluations
Leaders must assess their friends’ performance objectively, just as they would with any other team member. Avoid showing favouritism in evaluations and promotions.
Social Activities
It’s common for team members and leaders to socialise outside of work. These activities can help build team cohesion. However, be mindful not to create exclusive cliques that exclude some team members.
Lead by Example
Leaders who maintain friendships with team members can set a positive example of collaboration and teamwork. This can help foster a supportive and cohesive work environment.
Evaluate the team and organisational culture
The appropriateness of leader-team member friendships may also depend on the organisation’s culture. Some organizations encourage social connections among colleagues, while others have stricter guidelines. Be authentic and be aware of the culture.
Leaders and team members can be friends, but it’s essential to strike a balance between maintaining professional boundaries and building positive relationships. The key is to ensure that friendships do not compromise fairness, objectivity, or the overall harmony of the team and the workplace.
Rita Cincotta coaches, facilitates and speaks on individual and team performance, leadership development and ways of working. She works with organisations to develop human centred solutions that help people and businesses to thrive. You can join the elevate your leadership impact community here.